Friday, May 21, 2010

Addressing Your Invites...Etiquette Wise

Etiquette is something that many brides are not aware of has they start their process...I know that I definitely was not! While things have become more relaxed as the years go by, there is some proper etiquette when it comes to addressing invitations for the wedding. Here is some advice:



Social and Professional Titles
Your guests' names should be written in full on outer envelopes -- no nicknames or initials. Use the appropriate social titles as well, such as addressing married couples as "Mr. and Mrs." If a man's name has a suffix, write "Mr. Joseph Morales, Jr.," or "Mr. Joseph Morales IV"; "Junior" can be spelled out on a more formal invitation. It gets a little tricky when husband, wife, or both have different professional titles. If the husband is a doctor, for example, the titles will appear as "Doctor and Mrs."; if the wife is a doctor, her full name would come first, as in "Doctor Sally Carter and Mr. John Carter." If both are doctors, write "The Doctors Carter." If they have different professional titles, list the wife first: "The Honorable Pamela Patel and Lieutenant Jonathan Patel, U.S. Navy." If a wife has kept her maiden name, her name should appear first and be joined with her husband's using "and."
Married Couples with Same Last Names
This classic envelope incorporates social titles and the husband's first name on the outer envelope, and only the titles and last name on the inner one. Note that all the words -- including the state and the house number, because it is less than twenty -- are written out. The writing doesn't have to be aligned on the left -- calligraphers often stagger the lines in eye-pleasing ways.
Married Couples with Different Last Names
When a husband and wife have different last names, the wife's name is traditionally written first. Connecting the couple's names by the word "and" implies marriage. For an unmarried couple that lives together, names should be written on separate lines without the word "and." On the inner envelope, both are addressed by their titles and respective last names.
Families with Children
This outer envelope is identical to that of a couple without children -- its writing, which is for the purposes of the post office, should be as simple and clear as possible. On the inner envelope, the name and title of each invited guest in the household is written out. A boy under the age of 13 is "Master," not "Mr." Girls and young women under age 18 are called "Miss."
Single Guests
For a single woman, either "Ms."or "Miss" is appropriate; many people find the former preferable. The guest's name is the only one that appears on the outer envelope. On the inner envelope, however, write the guest's name followed by "and Guest." If you know whom he or she will be bringing, it's more personal to include that person's name, on a separate line.

Addresses
Spell out all words in an address on your envelopes. Rather than "St.," "P.O. Box," and "Apt.," use "Street," "Post Office Box," and "Apartment." This applies to city and state names as well; instead of abbreviations, write "Saint Paul, Minnesota," and "Washington, District of Columbia." House numbers smaller than twenty should also be spelled out.
Return Addresses
Write out all words here, too. The preferred place for printing the return address is on the envelope's back flap. Traditional etiquette called for blind embossing, or colorless raised lettering, for wedding invitations; the idea behind this was that guests would get their first glimpse of the fancy engraving on the invitation itself. Blind embossing is still available, although the United States Postal Service discourages it, as it is difficult to read; today, most couples have the return address printed in the same method as their invitations.
Outer and Inner Envelopes
Sending out an invitation in two envelopes ensures that each guest will receive a pristine envelope, even if the outer one has been torn or soiled in the mail. Still, the two are not necessary; you may omit the inner envelope if you wish. The outer envelope includes all of the information the postal service needs for delivery. The inner envelope should have the names of the invited guests in the household (including children, whose names do not appear on the outer envelope).

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